My MEGAschedule MEGAstinks

C.-Man

I set my alarm for Friday night, 6:00am with a list beside my alarm clock, I had a MEGA DAY planned…1. Fix healthy breakfast; lay out healthy lunch, bible study 2. Walk 30 minutes 3. Fill in list for upcoming students, create mock schedule, and outline reeval/testing dates 4. Play outside with C. 5. Pick up steaks to grill out with family 6. Finish laundry and lay out outfits for the week 6. End the day with a glass of wine, blog, and catch up on Degrassi: The Boiling Point (yes, I watch that show sue me I’m addicted!)


When the alarm clock buzzed in my ear, I switched if off with great gusto…I was dreaming about Vin Diesel and I just feel that is more important on a Saturday morning. Of course two hours later the piercing sounds of C’s harmonica blaring in my ear killed the sexiness of my dream right away. By the time we all got up, my husband reminded me that he would not be home until late tonight because after work he was going to the Panthers game (thanks for the heads up, such a M-A-N). Those were the first two hitches in the schedule. It was me and C. the rest of the day… and night! At 9:00am I made the executive decision to just fill up some bowls of sugary cereal, I mean if your already bouncing off the walls...why not make it that more interesting!? I chose to put in some Facebook time and I threw in as many clothing into the washer as humanly possible (you know you do it...so full the machine starts knocking). Then I got the call that screwed my schedule even more, there was a pizza party going on at the In-laws, and didn’t your hubby tell you all about it?? Nooooo….so off I dash to push my sweaty hair in a pony tail, put something on C. that isn’t stained, and we join the party…pizza and cookies for lunch!!

After the party, I head to Wal-Mart…maybe I can salvage my day and get that healthy dinner and wine, and get some school work done. I move through the store and C. begs for a miniature skateboard for $2.97...I ponder…YES its worth it to entertain him at home. That is when I meet up with church members who reminded me that our End of Summer blowout party was tonight at the local pool! (great..noooooo I did not remember, I wonder how bad it would look if I cuss right now, I’m guessing not good so I hold it in). I get to hear C. beg to go, and who am I do deny him some good Christian socializing at a pool because of my schedule? I complete my trip; I realize I’ve put so much crap in the buggy..I can’t afford my wine (the Checkbook Nazi that is my husband has been on the case) and I don’t need to get my healthy dinner, because guess what the main course is at the church party tonight..pizza and cupcakes for dinner!

To make my day complete, my son and I swim in the rain in the water at the pool. He had a great time but I was convinced we would die of pneumonia and we ended the night early cuddled in towels that smell of mold, even C. said “Mom we stink bad”. Have you figured out yet, I am NOT mother of the year.

It was the final straw, and I REALLY hate to admit this, but I got lost going home from the pool. Those of you who know me say ‘not surprised’ those of you who don’t say ‘are you nuts’. I can get lost from my house to the mailbox people (and it was dark…and I was distracted)! Lucky for me you can keep driving from the pool and end up somewhere familiar. I took a 47 minute detour. That’s when I started to get ticked. I was fuming. Well that went well!!!! WHY! WHY! WHY! can’t anything work as planned, now I’m behind and stressed , and you know life really stinks at times, and I’m never going to get my act together, and this was a wasted day…then I heard a little voice in the back of the car “Mom why did that skateboarder skate on the ramp naked?”



“Do what?? What in the blazes are you talking about?”

“You know on TV, the skateboarder was naked on Robby Big, and that is gross...why do boys skateboard naked?”

(I know what you’re thinking, you let C. watch MTV? Yes, we watched two episodes of Rob and Big, the Einstein videos for kids bored the guy and me too, and I guess I missed some parts)!

I then proceeded to explain that boys try to make people laugh, and that getting naked is NEVER a good idea. The point being for the next 47 minutes C. and I talked about Rob and Big, the pool party, his cousins, and why he wants to be a mascot that drives monster trucks (with FULL clothing) one day. I have to say it was one of the best conversations! C. will be 5 years old in about three weeks, the time is flying by and I can only imagine how many questions he has had that I haven’t had time to answer. The MEGAstress I have isn’t going away, but I know God made that detour for us for a reason…and I have to trust that that MEGAgirl will get that MEGAlist done some other time and will just appreciate this day for what if offered!

Mega-Meditation

I don’t intend to blog daily, but the first day of school is tomorrow! Yes sirrrrreee, time for me to Megamode and remove myself from the couch and McDonald’s bag. Since I was a child, even when I thought I was a stupid kid, I got a little excited about school. The start of school for me has always been like most people’s New Years Eve. It was a time to start fresh. Everything is the most organized before you get to school. I really loved the back to school commercials. Remember the JC Penny and Trapper Keeper commercials? The girl with the long, flowing, blond hair looked so cool, and the captain of whatever sports team would flirt or try to steal the Trapper Keeper? I loved those commercials because I knew that this would be the year that I would magically turn into the cool, skinny, blond, funny, pulled together girl of the school with the brand name Trapper Keeper, not the dollar store knock off that I usually had to get (although once I was allowed to purchase a George Michael folder and was in heaven). Of course my back to school always started with good intentions but ended up with me 1. in trouble 2. humiliated 3. With Jell-O on my shirt (don’t ask me to explain that one).


My first New Year school goal was to decrease stress and begin exercise this morning. I turned to Exercise TV on Demand to find the perfect workout…one in which I could burn lots and lots of calories but without really moving or sweating much. I spent so much time looking at all the workouts that I actually didn’t get around to exercising but I did run across a whole series on Meditation. Many of my friends at work have suggested that I Meditate (just because I break #2 pencils and sing Vanilla Ice at random, they worry). Soooo I decided I would Meditate this morning. This is how it went:

The Stress Free Breathing began by showing a motion that would instantly relax you by closing one nostril and then the other over and over. I tried it and I almost passed out due to a lack of oxygen…soooo on to the next video Meditation for Weight Loss. The instructor then begin to explain how you should observe your food, feel the food without touching, then enjoy small tastes without sound or distraction. DO WHAT!?! You can actually taste and observe food? I thought the best part of food was the thought of the next bite while you shovel the first. And hellloooo? Do you work in an elementary school or eat with males? It’s like an Olympic event to eat and go to the bathroom in under 15 minutes! Onto the next video- Water Meditation… which requires one to relax and deep breathe to water pictures. ‘Just clear your mind and breathe in and out deeply’ (me: relaxing, breathing got it). ‘Breath in and out..Feel your mind empty’ (me: what time is it anyway? 7:00?? Holy Crap, I’ve got to get C. up?)…’feel the water wash over you’ (me: I think I have to pee)…’breath and feel your body relax’ (me: did I remember to put his daycare bag in my car? Oh man…I have to empty my mind)….’just let go and feel yourself energize for your day ahead’... (Me: empty my mind…empty my mind…what time is it? 7:01!)

Needless to say the meditation didn’t work, but I’m not going to be too hard on myself and I will try again another time. Even with past experiences, I still have hope when school starts…hope that I can help one child (or all of them) have a better year than he or she could imagine.

Mega Mode will Save the Day!

Ok..I’ll just air my dirty laundry out right away. Confession number #1, I use to love comic books. I know this is quite hard to believe with my debonair and classy ways, but it’s very true. (I will try to keep my confessions to a one blog minimum). I’ve been cleaning this summer and ran across a few types of comics I salvaged..Spiderman, Wonder Woman, Superman, Archie and Betty..but my all time favorite was The X-Men! Don’t be fooled by the name, those suckers couldn’t get to the grocery store without the women of X-Men. I loved Storm, Phoenix, Polaris…ok I have to stop my Geek is coming out too fast. I love how in comic books, no matter how bad things seemed to get, I mean the “world is coming to an end man!” out comes our heroes and heroines with a POW, KAPOW, CLANG, BOOM, and they save the day…every time, it’s great!


As the summer ends, my friend and I had an eventful trip to the big city to listen to a speaker/author by the name of Jonathan Mooney. Jonathan was a former “lazy”, “bad”, “rad”, “exceptional needs”, “learning disabled” “weirdo”, kid, and we could not WAIT to hear what he had to say! As we took our seats in the very back row, I myself was having trouble keeping the anxiety down. I couldn’t get off my own worries such as my future students (my biggest) and most diverse class yet, and the adults who don’t understand those who are bad and those who are different. I was even having trouble motivating myself to get things done around my own home, and then there was the biggest issue of all “THE Case that is C.”- C. is my own four year old son who was driving me to the brink of insanity (and you think I’m joking). Mind you, I love my son and he is a great kid! Still he is like a walking Dr. Pepper bottle who just swallowed a case of Mentos…he’s moving uncontrollable at all times and I am just waiting for the BIG Explosion, and the BIG BLAME…otherwise known as mom guilt, because I suck right!?. I just wish I could turn into MEGAmomMODE, MEGAwomanMODE, MEGAicanreisitchocolateMODE (at this time I would take anything)…and turn into those comic book stars that knock out the problems like WHAM!BAM!WOWZA!

Before I could dwell on it too much, Jonathan Mooney begin to speak and I was hanging onto his every word…because what he was saying was simple and inspiring and great!!! But, easy to forget in the daily grind that is education and life! I was reminded great minds don’t think alike, intelligence is relative, break the rules, cultivate intelligence not conformity, and most important life is not one size fits all! Today I was reminded that every good heroine has her own story. …my MEGAMODE, looks totally different than any other mom, teacher, or child…and that as long as I’m working, loving, and trying the best I can, that is enough to Save the Day! Until next blog...KPLOWY!